我为什么去意大利?

我为什么去意大利?
我为什么去意大利?

我为什么去意大利?
此前,她在休斯电子公司及美国国防部做过咨询,现在供职于一家意大利的管理咨询公司.她还在教会唱诗班担任女高音,常常走到哪儿就唱到哪儿.I fell in love with Italy as a tourist. On a business trip for an aerospace company, I noticed that the office door handles were all different. There was a design element in everything – the light fixtures, the architecture. I thought “What a thrill, working where this is normal.” There was a good feeling at work. Everybody went out to dinner on Friday nights. Then I fell in love with an Italian. I moved to Turin with my daughter, aged five, and son, aged eight, to be with Norberto in 1992. Our son Gianluca, now 13, was born in Turin.我去意大利旅行时,遭遇了一场爱情.那次商务旅行是去一家航空制造公司,我发现那家公司办公室的门把各式各样.在意大利,每样东西都有独特的设计元素,如灯光的设置和建筑风格等等.这一切都让我兴奋,可意大利的员工却习以为常.在这工作,感觉很棒.一到周五晚上,大家就出去吃饭放松.后来,我与一个意大利人坠入了爱河.1992年,为了跟诺伯特(Norberto)在一起,我带着5岁的女儿和8岁大的儿子搬到了意大利西北部的都灵（Turin）.我们的儿子吉安卢卡(Gianluca) 在那出生,小家伙如今已经13岁.My two older children started at the American school in Turin, which was problematic. Now I think it would have been better – if tough – for them to start in an Italian public school. The Italian elementary school is welcoming and nurturing and the public schools are good. After a year, we moved out to Pecetto Torinese, a town of about 3,000 in the hills nearby. There my children moved to an Italian school. 起初,我两个稍大些的孩子进了都灵一所美国学校读书,可是问题很多.回头想想,如果当初让他们上一所意大利国立学校的话,尽管这对他们来说很难,但情况可能会好一些.意大利的小学不仅态度友好,而且很适合孩子们成长.同时,他们的国立学校也很好.一年后,我们一家搬到了皮埃蒙特(Pecetto orinese),一个只有三千居民、靠山的小镇.到那以后,孩子们去了一所意大利学校. After three years, my older children returned to their father in America. Norberto, Gianluca and I moved to Asti. I was at a loss because my daughter was not adjusting and I thought it was a language problem. It was probably a teacher problem. Two families on two continents has not been without consequences. It takes constant communication and e-mail has been essential. I go home [to the US] two to four times per year and for special occasions.三年之后,两个大孩子去了美国,回到我前夫身边.诺伯特、吉安卢卡和我搬到了阿斯蒂 (Asti) .女儿当时很不适应,弄得我也不知所措.我估计问题出在她的语言上,也有可能有老师的因素.两个家庭分居在两大洲,难免会出现问题.电子邮件成为我们主要的交流方式.一年之中,我回美国两至四次,不包括特别的假期.Commuting between Asti and Turin took about 30 minutes by car so we decided to move to Lodi, where my husband grew up. Moving near to the old family home is a real Italian thing. 往返于阿斯蒂和都灵之间,需要半小时车程.于是,我和丈夫决定搬去他的家乡——洛迪(Lodi).回老家也是意大利的习俗.My singing was fantastic for integration. In Pecetto I joined a choir that sang in its own dialect, which is different from those of towns only three miles away. In Asti I met a policeman through singing who smoothed out getting my residency permit. I joined to sing but it was useful too. In Lodi I sang in the cathedral choir. Now I travel too much but I can always find the wonderful people I met since they won't move from where they were born. 我的声音特别适合合唱.在皮埃蒙特时,我加入了一个本地的唱诗班,要用方言唱歌.这里的方言很独特,三英里以外的地方就不说这种方言了.在阿斯蒂,我通过唱歌认识了一位警察,他帮我拿到了居民身份证.我喜欢唱歌,没想到唱歌还挺实用.在洛迪时,我也是教堂唱诗班的一员.现在,我也常常旅行,但总能碰到熟人,因为他们都不愿离开家乡. In Italy, women my age won't do what I do. I'm on the road 40 per cent of the time. Most women with children don't have the energy or can't go away because they're responsible for the kids. They work an incredible amount: 8am to 7pm and later at home doing laundry, taking care of the kids and making dinner. It's simply expected of them. 在意大利,到了我这种年纪,女人恐怕都不会做我现在做的这些事而.比如,把40%的时间都花在路上.多数有孩子的女性,要么没有剩余精力,要么因为孩子而不能外出.她们日常的工作时间,是早8点到晚7点.这已经很让人难以接受,此外还要担负一堆家务活：洗衣服,照看孩子,准备晚餐.这都是日常职责.I manage because I have a support system: my mother-in-law. She does my laundry. She irons Norberto's shirts. She cooks dinner whenever we are in town. My parents-in-law are stimulated by us. They are near 80 and Gianluca is an important part of their life. There's a synergy. This isn't typically Italian; ours is a collaborative family. I hear about mothers-in-law with ego problems. Mine has always worked and wants to be useful and I'm thankful.我与她们不同的是,我有一位好帮手——我的婆婆大人.她会帮着洗衣服,熨我丈夫的衬衣,也为我们做饭.公公婆婆是因为我们才如此有精神.他们快八十了,还是一直这么照顾着我丈夫.这让我感到相互配合带来的优势.我们家跟传统的意大利式家庭不同,我们讲究合作.大家都说,婆婆普遍有利己思想.但是,婆婆却是我们的好帮手.我非常感谢她为我们所做的一切. I've mellowed here. Americans are black and white; they're punctilious and not as interested in rapport, workwise. Americans live their resumés. It's more competitive. You can blow it in one bad day by sending a project crashing. Over here it's put in a different context. In America you can trust contracts – the black and white – more but it's less human. 在意大利,我人静下来了.通常,美国人讲究黑白分明；就工作而言,他们拘泥于形式,不讲求人与人之间的亲密沟通,人人都为职业而生活.你可以因为某天某个失败的项目被毁了,这与意大利完全不同.美国人更相信白纸黑字的合同,少了些人情味.It's a time question. My theory is this: the colder the climate, the smaller the measure of time. In warm climates they measure hours, not minutes. In America, it's seconds; punctuality counts. Maybe because I worked in the Pentagon. At the Massachetts Institute of Technology they measured the shortest distance between classrooms. Here it's: “Is there a good bar on the way?” From a management point of view, this is better because management is about relationships. Theory and strategy are essential but in the end effective management is all about relationships.这与时间有关.我的看法是：气候越冷,时间越短.在温暖的气候中,人们计算小时,而不是分钟.在美国人们拿秒钟计时,惜时如金.或许,这是因为我的工作地点在五角大楼.麻省理工大学(MIT)的师生通常会提出这类问题：两个教室之间哪条路最短?在这条路上是否有好的酒吧?从管理学的角度看,这样很好,因为管理管的是关系.理论和策略固然重要,但管理的核心始终是人际关系.意大利仍然是个有性别歧视的国家,但作为一个另类,作为有口音的美国移民,我可能不用扮演传统妇女的角色,至少在意大利的男人看来,意大利妇女与我不同.在意大利,高层中的女性通常没有得到正式的认可.比她们无能的男人却居在她们之上,只是因为男人看起来更像经理.我现在的公司不同,看重的是员工的能力和女性的优势. 我是个乐观主义者,从没想过有什么不能做的事儿.有一次,面试的人问我养育孩子的问题,还是个决定因素,这让我很吃惊.我有一位朋友,因为到了生孩子的年龄就被拒绝了.我通常会在面试时,讲清我的年龄.现在,我已经把洛迪当作自己的家乡了.但我仍然想念着皮埃蒙特,也爱着都灵.它优雅,有着迷人的历史和多民族的融合.洛迪是我在这六年中呆的最久之地.44年中,我换了22个住地.现在,我终于可以安定下来了.